After years of struggling to learn how to crochet, I feel like I've finally got to a point where even some of the crazy and complicated stuff I see in crochet patterns is 'do-able' - not as neatly as some of the Amigurumi you see being shown off on "proper" crochet sites ("Amigurumi" is the Japanese phrase for tiny crochet stuff) but still doable. But why have all my other obsessions taken a back seat for something that blokes my age are not supposed to give a fig about (google for bloggers and crochet fans and see how many males you can spot doing this, you'll find a tiny tiny handful if you're lucky!)
In the past week I have spent approximately zero hours losing myself in virtual worlds playing videogames, I have spent a minimal number of hours drawing (my passion, or at least it was). Crochet just seems like a good way to keep my hands and brain occupied, and I've always sought that in my hobbies.
Quite simply, Crochet scratches an itch to learn a skill that most people don't care about, a skill that's a bit 'old fashioned' and definitely not a skill that you'd normally associate with old blokes like me. It also appeals because there are so many different aspects to learn that at first seem relatively simple, but are actually devilishly nuanced and complicated.
Learning the difference between single crochet, double crochet, half double crochet, magic rings, chains, colour switching, popcorn stitches (which I LOVE) and a myriad of other strange terms - then learning how to do them all is horribly addictive for someone like me.
Some things about it drive me slightly crackers though...
1) You can never have enough yarn. Ever. Full stop. In nearly everything I've made, I've ended up running out of a particular colour, or in the huge bag of cheap yarn I snagged from the internet, I've never quite got the right colour to complete a project (and always shy away from the 'expensive' yarn purely because, to me, it's like buying expensive art materials - you never feel that stuff is justified for a rank amateur like yourself).
2) Counting hurts. Crochet relies heavily on counting, and if the usual household shenanigans kick off mid row and you lose your count in the middle of a row like SC 8, INC, SC7, TURN, INC, SC8 you're bolloxed and your work will look weird when it's finished (in fact even when you're not being distracted by noise or other things, sometimes if you're a number-blind twerp like me, you just miscount and that's all there is to it).
3) Your family are harsh critics. You see a beautiful Amigurumi version of a character, you try and crochet that character and you're happy with the results. You then show your family and they're invariably either so 'meh' about it you wonder why you bothered, or they're unaccepting of your creation because it's not a pixel-perfect rendition of the character it's supposed to be...
Yes, this was my attempt at crocheting Marshal from Animal Crossing...and my daughter was so meh about it that my tiny little ego was shattered into a million pieces (not really, I just stuck it on my computer because I think it's cute).
4) You've no idea how big some things are going to get when you start out. I started crocheting the little blue imp from "My Neighbour Totoro" (who looks like a mini blue version of Totoro himself) and the thing just grew...and grew...and grew until it was almost pillow-sized. Not what I expected when I started out as most of the photos of the finished work within the pattern "looked" pretty tiny. And naturally I ran out of yarn while making it. About three times. So there's that as well.
5) Physically, I am not cut out for Crochet. No really, I think you have to be match fit with perfect posture to undertake this hobby. No, stop laughing, I am not kidding. You see the problem is that most of the time you're focussing on your hands, your neck is bent, you sit in one position for hours at a time as you finish off each row and before you know it (well, at my age anyway), you're in ABSOLUTE FECKING AGONY because you failed to move around enough while crocheting. I've had three instances of serious back and neck pain through this but most of that was initially when I was concentrating so hard I was actually quite tense. Now I'm relaxing into things a bit, I'm taking regular 'hook breaks' to ensure I don't end up crippled.
Things I wish I'd really known when setting out:
Single Crochet is not the same as a slip stitch. For ages I just did slip stitches for everything, and my work "looked" ok but now I know how to properly single crochet I feel like I've been party to some divine knowledge passed down from the very gods.
Increases and Decreases are not as scary as they sound. In fact invisible increases and decreases aren't even that scary either and they look AMAZING when you work out how to do them
The magic circle - no one tells you what to count in terms of the number of stitches you put into it. Does the first loop count as a stitch? Does the bit where you slip-stitch the ends together count as a stitch? WHY DOES NO ONE EVER TELL YOU THIS? (In the end you work out that shoving extra stitches in is something you're going to have to do - a lot).
Stuffing. I mean ffs, totally common sense that running out of stuffing when you're making stuff like I like to make pretty much stops your project right then and there. I never realised how much of the stuff you get through even for smaller models (in fact the 'totoro buddy' above ended up being stuffed with tons of old material to pack 'im out as I'd run out of the proper hollow fibre stuff). My advice, buy a kilo or more of the damned stuff because you WILL use it.
Yarn fraying. Again this can be offset by using slightly better yarn (but I found even the most basic acrylic yarns cut down on the fraying quite a bit as does a decent set of different sized hooks). Better materials = better results, who knew!
For now, I'll carry on until I get to a point where I feel like I'm really nailing the sort of gorgeous crochet models you see online. Time and practice dude, time and practice but for what it's worth, if you've ever been interested in learning Crochet, I can honestly say the reward in making your first "thing" is just crazily satisfying so do give it a go.
Really good starter kit links (Apologies for these being Amazon Links - you will also find LoveCrafts.com a good source for materials but a LOT pricier!)
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